To Be Continued...

My 2019 Vision Board

Hello 2019! We're officially one week into the new year. This New Year's Eve, my cousin and I decided to make vision boards (pictured above). I had never made one, but I'm always down to create. And I thought it would be a good idea to try to get a handle on the upcoming year. The new year was only a few hours away and I was already trying to get a handle on it, but I had good reason.

The last two weeks of the year had been extremely brutal for me. Here I had made it all year long to wait until the week of Christmas to have a mental meltdown. To say that I was feeling overwhelmed is a complete understatement. I felt like I was completely losing it and spiraling out of control. I took two weeks off from work to rest and get it together, only to spend the entire time catching up on side work, taking on new design and video projects (crazy, I know), creating lesson plans, planning activities for the kid, sneaking to wrap gifts, and writing letters from Santa. Somehow I managed to squeeze in dates with friends I hadn't seen in forever because I had been so busy throughout the year. I had even gone as far as to write out a To-Do list and I never write out lists. Lists overwhelm me and give me intense anxiety, but this was absolutely necessary. I didn't start to feel better until midday on New Year's Eve, after I had finally finished EVERYTHING and I knew I never wanted to experience that ever again.

I usually don't set resolution goals. Not because I don't have any, but because I have a tendency to just blow with the wind (at times). Who am I kidding? That is me most of the time. So the times I have set goals for myself, those goals have either changed or life just happened, as if often does. Therefore, I made a conscious decision to only set "passion goals." For those are the goal that I believe I can achieve and know will never ever change - to create, to travel the world, to meet new people, to be inspired and inspire others, and to just experience. Experience life. Experience love. Experience now. All of which leads me to my ultimate goal, my forever goal ... happiness.

My decision to start this blog was very random, like many of my ideas. I was trying to fall asleep and failing miserably. You'd think I'd be used to it by now, seeing as though I've had insomnia for a long as I can remember. I always seem to get my best creative ideas when I'm buried under my pillow in dark of the night. I was thinking about setting the goal of finishing my website, which was also a 2018 goal. As you can see, that didn't quite happened. I started, but didn't finish. Then, I considered what my workload is going to be like this year and came to the realization that finishing my website was probably not a tangible goal this year. However, starting a blog is.

I absolutely love to write. I always have. And writing is one of the few things I always have time to do. I usually carry a journal around with me and my phone is full of dozens of notes. Any and every time I get the urge to write, I write. Therefore, a blog I can also write. And this will be a great way for me to not only keep a record of the goals I meet, but to showcase everything I'm doing and working on in one place. I do so many things and it's difficult to show that. My Facebook and Instagram pages mainly showcase my photography, but I am a melting pot overflowing with love, art, and creativity. I just haven't quite figured out how to display that in a way that makes sense. But here I can. This blog can be anything I want it to be.

This is where I can be free. To be continued...

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